Super Busy

I worked all day, with limited breaks. Not cool.

I tried to get in contact with various bookshops in the city about distributing this glorious magazine, but I didn't get to talk to any buyers. There are a lot of used bookstores in the city and they don't distribute magazines. Just thought that I would like to pass that information on to you.

I'm going home now.

Fin

Dear readers,

I'm sorry to inform you, but this is my last anonymous blog post as my last day as a zingtern was Friday. All I can say is, it's been a hell of a run.


Anonymous Intern

long week

And the week finally comes to a close.

The preparations for the launch party went up to the last minute (as per usual), but everything somehow came together (well, except for the clouds of cheese...). The stupid Powerpoint movie only worked so-so. It was such a big file that it crashed a couple of coputers, but we finally got it going. Except then about three quarters of the way through, the computer froze and crashed. Ugh. I hate computers.

A ton of people showed up, and everybody seemed to have a lovely time. We all talked up the magazine and I told some random people to keep an eye out for it on the news stand very soon.

Also Devon's food was super tasty.

Now it is time to go home and take a nice, long nap before hunkering down in my books for the next 60 hours straight (maybe with breaks for sleep and/or eating).

I will never get a man..

..because today I learned I can't iron. I never thought that this internship would make me feel like less of a woman. I was given the task of ironing sheets today and thought it would be a breeze. I was wrong. It was one of the hardest things in my life (which tells you that I have had a pretty easy life thus far). I struggled with the ironing and felt my femininity threatened.

Now I'm feeling pretty manly. Not really, because I'm not obsessed with the size of my genitals and my forearms are fairly weak.

That wasn't fair of me to judge the sexes so unfairly. Oh well.

Here's how I'm making money next. We'll see if that pans out.

thursday day

Today I turned a vintage Pucci dress into a swimming pool cover through the magic of Photoshop. I would post the picture, but the design computer is broken, so I can't put the picture on the database (and the design computer can't connect to the internet). But it looks swanky regardless!

We want to e-mail launch party invites with special, love-filled letters to writers/editors/press. So I fiddled with the database for a while, trying to fill in missing e-mail addresses, but most magazines do not list either the masthead or real contact information online. Soooo frustrating... I will have to send mass e-mails tomorrow asking for the addresses for specific people, and see if that gets me any luck.

Fun

Today I tried to get the word out about zing. We're trying to get several new distributors including Mercury Design Studio in Austin and Freecity Supershop in Los Angeles. We're totally taking over America, except for the lame parts. They know who they are.

I also wrote a letter to our lovely zingrec subscribers. If you're not a zingrec subcriber you're missing out. Your life won't be as fulfilling as those who do subscribe to zingrecs.* Be cool subscribe to zingrecs by sending an email to zingrec@zingmagazine.com.

After hearing about my co-worker's "30 days without alcohol ", I wanted to hit up happy hour. I'm an adult so that's what I'm doing right now. Maybe I'll see you there!!

Love,
The anonymous intern

*Not scientifically tested, therefore a lie.

blah blah blah

on friday we put addresses and stamps on the invitations for the preview party. many great people are being invited. on great person is yoko ono. i made sure to personalize her invitation with a drawing of a weird flower and a note to let her know that we "received her cds in the mail." my idea was that if i drew something that really hit home, she would show up out of curiosity. for example, if i drew, say, a dolphin, and she really liked dolphins, it would "hit home." it's like if i drew a picture of a blanket on devon's invitation, she would immediately think "niney" and would come to the party. so, for some reason, i came up with a weird flower.

what else...

oh yes, a former zingmagazine worker, sari (sp.?) had an opening that we were going to go to. devon bought her some sidewalk chalk in the shapes of sea life. an octopus, a mermaid with boobs, a lobster or something, and an eel-like creature with horse teeth. so she had us sign the note. devon wrote her name and a heart around it. because of this, i felt compelled to add a logo to my name, so i wrote my name and drew an arrow going right above it an an arrow going left underneath it. following this trend, anna drew a little curvy line with two upright lines going through it under hers, leah drew an anime face, and stecketee (sp.?), who joined us for a meeting at the zingmagazine remote office (the bar), wrote his signature, but she wouldn't be able to read it, so wouldn't knwo who signed it. danny wrote "you are the best danny" or something so you couldn't really tell if "you" were "the best" or danny was "the best." sneaky sneaky. later, devon yelled at ze germans.

another blog master piece.

Work and Party

I'm going to a party with free booze
I bet you're so jealous.

I also rearranged the storage closet.
You would be impressed at how strong I am.

mmmmyeah

We're taking a field trip to the Whitney, then probably getting beers. Building up our minds so there are more brain cells to kill yay!

Photoshop is being an asshole. Computers are evil.

When Hanson comes I am going to beat them up for stealing my last name, spelling it wrong, and then writing annoying pop songs to forever haunt me.

Apparently, David Bowie is holding a music festival next month. He is the coolest man alive. I want to go. Maybe zingmagazine can score us some free tickets?

Au revoir!

hold your horses there with these demands. if i would have known, i would have dragged my ill self out of bed to let you interns in. so, sor-ry.

besides this, we're arranging a two-date tour with nineties musical phenoms, hanson. first, they're going to have a blow-out, end-of-the-world performance at daniel hug gallery in la. free beer, food, cds, paintings, clothes, cigarettes, and kisses from hanson. after this, they're coming to nyc to play a super-duper double-dog secret show at zingmagazine's preview party. watch out, world! hanson's back! MMMMMM BOOPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tonite, knicks game, compliments of zingmagazine. the other week the circus came to town. elephants marching under the east river, down 34th st to madison square garden. they held each other's tails with their noses. hopefully the circus left town, otherwise you gonna have so splainin' to do, msg!

after that, drug party. we're going to snort our deceased relatives. then fall out of trees.

brrrrrr...

Wondering why there weren't many updates last week? It's because the bosses were out of town and a certain anonymous intern did not feel like coming to work. He was "sick." He was also the only intern with a key to the building. And he still owes us grilled cheese. Get your ass in gear, anonymous intern!

Anyways, the issue 21 slide show is almost done. All the art and ads have been converted into Photoshop images. All that's left to do is make the masthead and table of contents and other front of the book stuff into Photoshop, then finish placing the remaining images into Powerpoint, and then figure out how to get them to play for 30 seconds each. And it's only taken about 30 hours of work so far! Blech. Why must the computer only be really slow when I need it to be fast??

In other news, earlier today it went from snowing to sunny in a span of five minutes. What is going on? New York State weather is schizophrenic.










I want grilled cheese!